Friday Morning Epiphany (In letter form)

An open letter to myself:

Dear Kayla,

If your food-cooling/freezing device (aka fridge) has been out for a month and a half without managing to repair itself, the chances of it ever repairing itself are, I’d say, slim to none. Unplugging and re-plugging in the machine multiple times will not work. Don’t even think about trying that. In this case you might want to call a repairman who has the skills, knowledge, tools and experience to restore your (its) refrigerating abilities. I know this is a very difficult concept to grasp, but Kayla – if you don’t call someone to fix the refrigerator – NO ONE WILL. Perhaps if you drink a few glasses of wine before dialing the number, that will relax you and make this task a little less grueling. Just a suggestion.

Respectfully Yours (literally, too)
Kayla

Friday Afternoon Triumphs

So – since I’ve been birthing babies for the last 2 ½ years I’ve (obviously) put on a *few pounds here and there. I am just now beginning to shed a little of the excess weight, and that’s only because these two offspring refuse to feed and clothe and potty and bathe themselves; leaving me to run around haplessly (I have absolutely no clue if I used that word in the correct context…whatever) and tend to them. So – here I am at work in my ridiculously uncomfortable desk crossing and uncrossing my legs, raising and lowering my seat and trying just about anything to achieve a position in which I can function for the next 4 hours when I think “Wonder if I can sit Indian-style in the office chair again?”

I am happy to report that after some serious huffing and puffing and awkward assistance from a guy down the hall I have warped and maneuvered and twisted my body into the Indian style position – in my office chair. (Cue the Hallelujah chorus) I’m not letting this accomplishment go unnoticed either. I am finding any excuse to lure random passers-by into my office so that they might notice this feat and be tricked into thinking “Kayla must be really skinny if she can sit Indian Style in her office chair.” I have also decided that I will not remove myself from this position until 5:00 p.m. for a couple of reasons.

1) I’m not sure that I can be untwisted and unmangled from this chair by any means short of something surgical.
2) It took some serious effort to get here, I will damned if I get up simply because my bladder is about to explode (or other such nonsense)

I realize that at this point 95% of you are thinking; “it must suck to be a big girl and get excited over something this dumb” …. And you are correct – it pretty much does suck – but hey – if it weren’t for us big girls, you little ones wouldn’t look so good!


*By “a few” I mean “A whole lot”

“Happy Anniversary, honey.. 4 whole years – that’s a LOOONG time. It’s definitely time for a new one” (husband that is)
This was how mine and Allen’s morning conversation started. Of course - he answered me by saying “Just make sure he’s rich.”

All joking aside – today is a pretty special day for me. 4 years. 4 years. 4 years? I can’t believe I’ve been married to Allen for 4 years. It seems like we just met a few weeks ago. I will never forget the first few times I really “hung out” with Al. Although he was exactly the opposite of anything I ever thought I wanted – I could NOT get him out of my head. All I could think about was how “hot” he was, and how he made me laugh. It wasn’t too long before I decided that whether he liked it or not he was going to be mine, and I concentrated all of my efforts into having this man for myself. I didn’t have to put a whole lot of effort in however, because he (apparently) was diggin’ me as well. I think we both realized pretty early in the relationship that we really had something. It went far beyond physical attraction and surface infatuation. We had a dynamic that just worked; it worked so well that it almost broke us up a few times. We were so young – and neither of us ready to be faced with a lifelong commitment. It took a while, but we finally decided that young or not, mature or not, ready or not – we didn’t want to lose each other. A few years later Allen proposed and a year after that we were married! My heart still skips a beat when he walks in the room, I still love to be near him every second that I can. In fact – at Kenna’s wedding one of our good friends was commenting on how Allen and I seem like we just can’t get enough of each other. I will say that I love our relationship. We’ve been together so long that we know one another inside and out and we have a comfort level that knows no boundaries. But at the same time we still act like two teenagers just starting a relationship. Of course, we’ve had to fight like hell to get here. I cannot tell you how many people were against our marriage; how many people told us that we would never make it, and that we were too young and immature to know what we were getting ourselves into. Granted, we were very young and pretty immature; but we always knew it was going to be a tough road. We knew there would be rough days and hard times, we knew there would be points that getting out would be much easier than fighting to stay together. We walked into this marriage armed with that understanding as well as knowing that we had to put God at the top and center of our relationship. I guess in the scope of life 4 years really isn’t all that much, and we have a whole ‘lotta life left to screw this thing up – but we’re here now. We’ve made it thru 3 years of dating, 4 years of marriage, 2 kids with hopefully more to come and we’re still standing strong!

I love you, Allen. Thanks for sharing these years with me and sticking with me thru the rough stuff. Thank you for understanding my quirks and for strengthening my weaknesses. On this day four years ago I thought I loved you more than any human could love – I’ve since learned that I was very, very wrong as time and the birth of our daughters have multiplied my love for you exponentially.

Sweet girls..

We've had a great night at the McMillan house... Ashlyn played in her new Dora tent, Kenly rolled around in her new *contraption* and Mommy sat back and enjoyed it all! I did have a very serious conversation with Ashlyn tonight. It consisted of her explaining to me (all very matter-of factly) that birds fly to the moon, that her pink chair was on the moon - but she can't reach the moon - then she told me that her cousins Kaylee and Courtney could see the moon. The things that go on in that little head of hers make me laugh.

We've had a little jealousy around here in the last month or so. I think the fact that Kenly has a personality and is more mobile has been hard for Ashlyn to understand. I think we're on the other side of that for now though - as Ashlyn is back to being the caretaker. If Kenly cries Ashlyn RUNS to her screaming "I check her, Mommy!" I watched them playing tonight and it's amazing how Kenly's eyes light up any time Ashlyn is near. She already adores and looks up to her big sister and you can tell she just can't wait to run around and get into trouble with her. This is all still very new to me - the sibling bond is still such a foreign concept, but I love that I'm learning about it and witnessing it with my girls!

She is now Mrs. House!

Finally!! Kenna is married! I took all of the pictures with my *real camera* so I don’t have any from our little digital to share but I’ll try and find some soon. I will say that Kenna was the most beautiful bride (and that is in no way a biased opinion) and this was probably the most fun wedding I’ve ever been to (again, no bias). I suppose it helps that we all wore jeans, had a rockin’ band and 250 guests who were ready to party! I, of course bawled like a baby through the entire ceremony. I’m just so thrilled that my best friend found such an amazing man to spend her life with. David is so perfect for her and I can honestly say that I’ve known that from the first time she said his name. Of course – the fact that he puts up with me and my quirkiness makes him great in my book; he can really do no wrong as far as I’m concerned!

And now since the wedding madness is over perhaps I will be a better blogger… maybe even get some pictures of my kids up. Until then….

The joys and pains of motherhood...

I am amazed every day by motherhood. I was rocking Kenly to sleep tonight, and for the first time in a long time I was able to just *be* with her. No distractions. Just me and my second child rocking in harmony. I am blown away once again with the bond that exists between mother and child. She laid there across my chest peaceful, breathing softly and holding my finger in that precious little hand, and all was good with the world. It was a perfect moment. I sat there and just breathed her in, studied all of her little baby parts and tried to burn those pictures into my memory. She wasn't phased by my scatterbrained and stressed out and anxious mood - she just clinged on to me and wanted me to hold her, and of course sweet silent moments like these are what make being a mom so magical.

Now on to the "pains"...
I've been teaching Ashlyn to "shake her booty" (because we all know how imperitive it is for all 2 year olds to have this skill).. so we were shakin' it in the living room and I pinched Ashlyn and told her "you have such a cute little booty." She's in the copy-cat phase of life and promptly walked around behind me, pinched me and said "You have a cute little booty." Then she said "Mom, it's not little, it's BIG. Mine is little, yours is big"

Cute, Ashlyn. Reeeeaaaaal Cute. I just hope she doesn't take to letting complete stranger know how she feels about the size of their behinds; because I will not handle those situations appropriately. Rather than scold her - I feel that I will probably say something like "Well, we've taught her to be honest..." and then I will get punched in the face..... Nope. It's no good.

I should be working.... but

There are random white particles dancing about my office. It is peculiar.

It was a *Flamaskemy*

Don't bother looking *flamaskemy* up in the dictionary, it's not there. This, um, word was concocted in Kenna's chemically altered brain after her bachelorette party. (the altering chemical was beer, FYI) My Kenna is getting married on the 15th and we went to the Big D this weekend to celebrate the end of her singledom. I must send some shout-outs to the awesome Malouf's for letting us crash their awesome pad, and to my girl Tish and Lala for wrangling my babies until Allen could get home. Thanks so much - you really saved our lives!! It was truly a fabulous weekend. We had the best times just hanging by the pool, talking and laughing until the wee hours of the morning and finally by showing big city folk's how to truly party at Pete's Piano Bar.


I believe this is what a *Flamaskemy* looks like. By the way - apparently this word means "above fun, beyond happiness, etc"
Me and sweet Kenna. I am so very happy for and proud of her, and I'm super pumped that her marrying David will result in me gaining a second husband.... (don't ask)

This is the gang...

I'm not 100% sure why or how this picture came about...

This is Biff II. He has been the mascot for several bachelorette parties in his time... he was, at this point, tired as hell of hearing cackling women singing and watching them dance very badly. His only option was a dip in the *Cosmo* pool.

I probably won't have another post for at least a week.... I will be running around crazy trying to get Kenna married....

To swallow or not to swallow? (Totally G-rated)

I have long debated the use of the Crest Whitestrips . You see, my teeth have become, um... *un-white* (sounds better than yellowish, right?) but I've never been brave enough to use the strips for fear of the catastrophe that always seems to befall me when I attempt such things. Boy, do I know myself.....

So - as Allen and I are snuggling into bed I grab the box of whitestrips and attempt to read (again, in the dark - why did I not learn from the **Nyquil incident?) the directions. I open the package for the top strip ; somehow manage to put it on backwards...curse a lot... then finally get the wretched thing adhered to my teeth. I decide that I need a mirror to apply the bottom strip and walk over to the dresser. I got it on in a much quicker manner.... then go sit on the bed to wait the 30 minutes the box (I believe) said to wait. As I'm sitting the saliva in my mouth begins to build up... and the thought crosses my mind "Is it safe to swallow while wearing this contraption? Will the goo that is supposed to bleach my teeth have an effect on my insides if I swallow this?" I turn to get Allen's counsel on the matter only to find that he has passed out. I believe that was a good thing as he did not need to witness the ridiculousness that ensued. So I turn to the handy little booklet that comes with the whitestrips. I scour it, I even read the damned thing in Spanish - all to no avail. Nowhere does it mention whether or not it is safe to swallow. It states that you should not eat or drink whilst wearing the strips (check), it states that the peroxide used to whiten the teeth will not damage your tooth enamel, then it goes on to say "Whitestrips are proven safe when used as directed." Great, Does this mean that since I am not "directed" to swallow while I have these in that it's possibly not safe to do so? I decide to take the cautious route and not swallow... which means for 30 gruesome minutes I sat drooling spit+whitestrip goo onto a towel.. in the dark.... it was shear hell. I literally counted the seconds in the last minute... I removed the devices that were behind all of this agony - went and brushed the goo off of my teeth.. then I took a long,very satisfying drink of water...and at long last I swallowed. It was glorious. You don't realize how involuntary swallowing normally is until you are voluntarily trying to avoid it. I believe it put enormous strain on me thus giving me a sore throat.


**Let's just say that it was much too dark in my bedroom for determining the proper amount of Nyquil to administer (to myself). I'll leave the rest for your imagination....